How to milk a wild beast? Try the buffalo shoulder method! ROLAND WHITE reviews last night’s TV
The Hairy Bikers
Earlier this week it was revealed that the Duke of Edinburgh was a massive fan of The Hairy Bikers — and you’ll see why. Like the Duke, the Hairies are sensible males who get on with the job with out fuss.
They are simple and plain talking, and haven’t any truck with gimmickry. Unless, in fact, you rely the hair, the beards, Dave’s elaborate moustache and the motorbikes.
They’ve been going since 2004, however have lost none of their enthusiasm for meals and foodies. The first episode of The Hairy Bikers Go North (BBC2) started a tour of the north of England in Lancashire, the place all the things was ‘superb’ or ‘fantastic’. The surroundings was ‘beautiful’ —even the roads have been ‘beautiful’.
The solely whiff of criticism got here as they tasted a gin made by Hairy Si in a small distillery that appeared like a Victorian chemistry lab. Dave took a swig, appeared very stunned and delivered his verdict: ‘That takes the enamel off your teeth.’
Earlier this week it was revealed that the Duke of Edinburgh was a massive fan of The Hairy Bikers — and you’ll see why. Like the Duke, the Hairies are sensible males who get on with the job with out fuss
Lancashire turned out to be a centre of progressive delicacies. They discovered a pie van that did halloumi wraps and ciabatta bread alongside the conventional bacon and sausage butties (‘Ah, this is lush’). And they visited a cheesemaker who retains a herd of water buffalo.
‘How do you milk a water buffalo?’ Dave puzzled. ‘Very carefully,’ stated the farmer.
You additionally method them from the aspect in order not to alarm them. Not that the buffalo have been wanting alarmed. They appeared on disdainfully. Water buffalo famously haven’t any look after cookery-based TV.
Watching The Hairy Bikers is like being on any person else’s vacation. You get nice surroundings, loads of food and drinks (a microbrewer provided them 10 totally different beer samples) and a few good tales.
Si instructed how his grandfather spent an excessive amount of time consuming, so at some point his grandmother took his dinner to the pub then scraped it off the plate and on to his desk. He calmly referred to as for a knife and fork.
Just one small level. How do the bikers journey down all these small nation lanes with out as soon as having to pull over for a tractor?
Is there any present that’s fairly as daft as Taskmaster (C4)? It makes the U.S. slapstick comedy present Jackass appear like an Open University lecture on the Neo-Platonists.
You assume I’m exaggerating? Well, how would you describe a present that options comic Guz Khan firing plastic geese from a catapult in an try to burst a distant balloon?
The first in a new sequence meant a new panel of celebs to be given foolish issues to do. Alongside Khan have been quiz present presenter Victoria Coren Mitchell, actress Morgana Robinson, and comedians Desiree Burch and Alan Davies. The motion might be utterly baffling. One spherical concerned attempting to hit the present’s creator, Alex Horne, with a ball.
But why have been the contestants sporting onerous hats, and why was there a enormous plastic pod on the set with a plastic cactus?
Is there any present that’s fairly as daft as Taskmaster (C4)? It makes the U.S. slapstick comedy present Jackass appear like an Open University lecture on the Neo-Platonists
It is my obligation to report that Victoria Coren Mitchell isn’t excellent at throwing. She flung the ball at Alex, missed, and apologised to him — probably the most English second ever in the historical past of the sport present style.
Taskmaster is a kind of programmes that could possibly be very irritating, nevertheless it’s good natured and someway sucks you in.
Oh, and in the event you’re ever in a position the place your life depends upon puncturing a plastic balloon whereas standing behind a rope, ask for the scissors. You can then lower the string, which holds a sharp portcullis gate above the goal space. Trust me, the scissors appear costly by way of factors nevertheless it’ll save a lot of time in the future.
Prank of the week: Naughty Siegfried took revenge on a grumpy farmer by showering him with the contents of a cow’s abdomen in All Creatures Great And Small (C5). Hasn’t buyer care come a good distance since Nineteen Thirties Yorkshire?