Most of us have known grateful people and people who are less than thankful for what is happening in their lives.
Meeting these opposites might make you wonder what daily habits make you grateful in the first place. It can also make you think, “How can I avoid a lack of gratitude?” No one wants to be embittered, angry, resentful, or alone, but the pattern of bad habits creates that type of personality.
The good news is that we can get rid of bad habits and replace them with good ones so we can be more grateful for what we have every day. Let’s look at some positive behaviors you can use to avoid the “ungrateful attitude.”
If practiced often, these habits can make you more grateful
A pattern is something you constantly waste time on, and it can be hard to break it. Adding another new practice is more accessible than dropping a bad one, so start building the habit of gratitude immediately.
Eventually, old negative habits will disappear as they are replaced by the good feelings that rewarding practice gives you.
1. Grateful people take responsibility for their happiness
You are only a victim if you allow yourself to be a victim. If you are in a situation that makes you unhappy, acknowledge that you have the power to move, act, and stand up for yourself. Tell yourself, “If I’m unhappy, I can walk away from this person or situation.”
If you decide to stay with someone who makes you unhappy or in a place that makes you sad, you have agreed that this is what is best for you now. Deciding that not acting is best for you is like saying you are grateful for the experience of knowing what you don’t like so you know better what you want and can find more of it in the future.
2. Grateful people turn vulnerability into strength
We all have strengths and weaknesses regarding our personalities. Of course, we want to build on our strengths and learn from our weaknesses, but we understand what a gift your vulnerabilities are.
Brené Brown writes in her book:
Vulnerability sounds like truth and feels like courage. Truth and courage are not always convenient, but they are never weak.”
Admit your shortcomings to others and ask for help to correct them. Let them see that you are not perfect, but you know how to use your imperfections to become a better person. You would never blame someone else for your shortcomings because you would not be the person you are today without them.
3. Make meaningful connections with other people
Gratitude is an attitude of gratitude for life experiences and lessons learned from them. Sharing these experiences with others helps us reinforce the lessons learned and hear the life lessons that others have learned.
Researchers studying gratitude have found that it is associated with positive mood, good social connections, well-being, and spiritual connection.
Brené Brown says: “I define connection as the energy between people when they feel seen, heard and appreciated; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from relationships.
4. Grateful people serve the community
Hospital, homeless shelter, community food bank; you have the opportunity to experience what it’s like to live with much less than you currently have and with everything that should make you grateful.
Seeing the discrepancy between what you have and what others live without is one way to avoid habits that make people ungrateful.
5. Keep a Journal of Serum They’re Thankful for
Researchers have studied the impact of a grateful look on psychological and physical well-being. They found that deliberately focusing on blessings by writing them down can have emotional and interpersonal benefits.
Participants were told, “There are many things in our lives, big and small, for which we could be grateful. Think back to the past week and write down on the lines below up to five things in your life for which you are thankful or thankful.
Participants in the study cited the following examples of grateful experiences:
- Waking up this morning
- Generosity of friends
- God for giving me determination
- For wonderful parents
- Lord, for one more day
- At the Rolling Stones
As another example of how you can do this at home, the author’s successful sister keeps a thank you jar on the counter and has a habit of writing a few things she’s grateful for every day on slips of paper. The jar is opened the next New Year and spends time celebrating the previous year’s blessings.
6. Understand that good things don’t always happen to good people
In an ideal world, good things happen to those who do good. However, life is not always fair. It would be helpful to learn to stop thinking that you are owed something, as this can help change your attitude.
Think of people with cancer or other severe illnesses and those who have survived hurricanes, tornadoes, and other natural disasters. These unsuspecting people have become victims of circumstance. The Bible says in Matthew 5:45 that it rains on the righteous and the unrighteous, meaning that time and chance happen to everyone.
Learn to be grateful for your blessings, for being spared from heartache, and don’t think that the Universe owes you anything. As you develop this mindset, your gratitude will increase.
7. Don’t put preconditions on your happiness
It’s a trap to think that you’ll be happy and content if you get this new job or a great new partner. Why do so many people put conditions on their happiness? You must understand that true bliss comes from within, not external success.
A merciful person does not try to control every aspect of his life because he understands this is impossible.
8. Grateful people understand that there is no rainbow without rain
Have you ever looked outside when it’s raining to see a rainbow? The sun must shine through the dark clouds for this natural phenomenon to occur. Without rain, there would be no rainbow, and without storms, there would be no growth in your life.
Realize that storms are as much a part of life as sunshine. Learn to admire and savor everything that happens in life because there is always something good in the bad.
9. Whatever happens, know that hope is not lost
Grateful people remain hopeful no matter what. They know everyone’s future is uncertain, and some things are out of their sphere of influence.
Realize and believe that there is more to life than your circumstances. Even in a rainy time, you can learn to dance and rejoice.
10. Grateful people forgive others for not being who they hoped
Why is forgiveness so hard? You know that you need to forgive so that you can be overlooked when something happens to you. Therefore, have you ever thought about forgiving people for not living up to your expectations?
It’s hard to understand, but they often have high hopes for each other. When someone doesn’t do what you think they should, bitterness quickly creeps into your heart.
Carrying a grudge is like grabbing a piece of hot coal from a fire to throw it at someone, but the problem is that you are the person who gets burned. Gratitude teaches you that you are not perfect, so you cannot expect it from others.
11. Positive self-esteem lays the foundation for gratitude
When you think grateful, your self-esteem is good, and you don’t have time to beat yourself up about the past. And when you are stuck in yesterday’s events, you cannot live for today.
When you are positive, your respect helps you feel grateful. Many people need a mental health tweak where they stop putting themselves down and start being cheerleaders.
12. Develop Healthy Thinking Habits
Did you know that you will feel good if you think positively too? Your brain is a powerful organ that you must use. The one full of gratitude does not complain about the lack of money in the bank account, but he is grateful that the bills are paid, and there is food on the table.
Your thoughts will become more positive when you stop dwelling on the negative. So many people focus on the wrong things instead of what they want. You can manifest something in your life just by developing a mantra that says something like:
- “I can do it.”
- “I will succeed no matter what.”
- “I can do whatever I want.”
Watch your attitude change and become more grateful when you use positive affirmations.
13. Focus more on lessons rather than frustrations
Of course, life is full of disappointments, and there is no escape from them. How many times does a child stumble before he learns to get up and walk? However, every time they fall, a lesson must be retained.
To stay upright, the infant must hold the legs in a certain way, balance, and avoid previous mistakes. The same analogy can be used for your life.
Every time you fail, you must learn a lesson. It would be helpful if you could see what you can do to stop falling a second time and grow and become a better person with that knowledge.
Someone full of gratitude knows that life will teach him lessons, and he accepts them and does not blame everyone around him for his mistakes.
14. Be flexible in your thinking
Have you ever met a person who knows all this? It doesn’t matter how hard you try; you cannot change their mind. Rigid thinking is unfavorable as it shows someone stubborn.
Closedness and narrowness will close many doors for you, but you will suddenly see many doors open when you open your perspectives. Someone who gratefully accepts others and is flexible enough to understand their point of view is not the only one to consider.
15. Know that a grateful attitude takes work
Finally, you must understand that gratitude does not always come by itself. The more complex the period of your life, the less gratitude you feel. However, keep striving and trying to get a good perspective; it can improve your life.
Final Thoughts on Adopting the Habits of Appreciative People
If you want to change your thinking, try this simple exercise. Take a pen and paper and write down the ten things you are most grateful for in your life. So what do you need to work on in your life? Why not change your mind about these troubling things and see a ray of hope in these dark clouds?