We’ve all been there:
Trapped in a breakup, looking for signs, our ex misses us and wonders if they will eventually return. If you are looking for universal clues that your ex will get back to you, you are in the right place.
I’ve compiled a comprehensive list of 21 surefire signs that your ex will be back in your life.
In this article, we will cover:
- 21 Sure Signs Your Ex Is Coming Back
- Resources to help keep the relationship healthy in case they return
- Expert links to help you get your ex back
It is always hard to go through a breakup. Especially when you still have a lot of feelings and unanswered questions.
When my ex and I broke up (for the second time), I was confused and struggling to find meaning in my feelings.
- Was this the last breakup?
- Did I even want this breakup?
- Did my ex want to come back?
I started missing hints from the last time we got back together. And, of course, they played for the second time as well.
Here are 21 real signs that your ex wants to get back to you:
1) They still have you in their lives
You guys still keep in touch. They haven’t blocked you from any social. They haven’t reached out to close shared accounts or get things back.
Often when a breakup is final, the fight or flight is over, and one person will try to remove all “traces” of the relationship. They will delete your photos on social media, block your calls or texts, and finalize anything that binds you together.
However, this was the case in my situation: if your ex is on the fence about the breakup, they will keep in touch. Sometimes in subtle ways.
They may not respond to your texts but leave them to “read.” He has not made any changes in his relationship status on social media. They still “like” your photos or haven’t asked to get their things back.
If they haven’t broken all the ties that bind you two, that’s a good sign that they’ll return.
2) What would a talented advisor say?
The above and below signs in this article will give you a good idea about whether your ex is about to return.
Still, talking to someone with different intuitions and getting guidance can be worthwhile.
They can answer all related questions and clear your doubts and concerns. Like, does your e still love you? are you with them?
I recently spoke to someone from Psychic Source after going through a breakup. After being lost in my thoughts for so long, he gave me a unique insight into where my life was going, including who I wanted to be with.
I was blown away by how kind, compassionate and knowledgeable they were.
In this love reading, a talented mentor can tell you where things stand with your ex and, most importantly, empower you to make the right decisions regarding love.
3) They keep reminiscing
When your ex and you talk and they’re constantly going down memory lane, it’s a clear sign that they still can’t let go of the time you spent together.
More often than not, this is a sign that they want to get back to you.
Dating expert Samira Sullivan notes,
“… an ex reminiscing is usually another sign that they want to try things again. Casually mentioning a memory the two of you shared or something you shared experienced, it’s their way of reminding you of your good times.
When my ex and I broke up, he often played the “remember when” game whenever we talked. As if he was afraid that I would forget or lose the memories we shared.
Of course, this made it easier for me to focus on the good memories and forget the bad ones, The reasons we broke up in the first place.
Serving nostalgia can be fun and a sign that someone is not letting go of the past. If your ex is constantly bringing up happy memories, know that it is likely that they are not ready to move on.
4) They creep your social
A super obvious sign that your ex doesn’t want to let go is if they are constantly checking your social media.
A “like” or “heart” is their way of saying, “hey, I’m still here.” This is a non-committal way of being present and letting you know they are still interested in your life.
If you check who saw your stories and your ex is always on the list, it’s a sure sign that they still want to be involved.
Additionally, permanently marking your presence on your social media accounts is a way for others to see that they are still around. It’s hard for other potential romantic partners to stay with you if your ex is always visible, and your ex knows that.
5) They constantly say that you are “just friends.”
Does your ex keep putting you in the “friend zone,” but there’s more?
It’s a sure sign that they’re coming back, but probably not how you’d like.
When my ex and I broke up (for the first time), he insisted that we were “just friends,” but nothing changed about our relationship except the fact that we weren’t sexually intimate (immediately).
We still talked often. We saw each other often, and our apparent chemistry eventually transitioned to casual sex.
She insisted that we were “just friends,” allowing me to be with other people while keeping me close.
It felt like a complicated open relationship, but I disagreed.
Relationship and breakup coach Brad Browning warns against being friends with an ex immediately if you want to get them back!
Browning claims that staying friends with an ex right after a breakup “will not give them a chance to develop feelings of nostalgia,” additionally, as was evident in my experience, being friends with an ex Staying gives them “complete control of the situation.”
If you’re in the same dilemma, I recommend checking out Brad Browning’s free video, where he explains how to get over your breakup.
Their Ex-Factor program has helped thousands of men and women (myself included) navigate how to reconnect with their ex happily and healthily.
6) Your ex still makes plans with you
This is a big sign that your ex is coming back. I mean, if you still have plans or continue to make them, it’s pretty evident that they enjoy spending time with you.
When my ex and I broke up, we still had commitments together. Concerts, trips, events.
He could have quickly canceled or moved in with someone else, but he insisted that we still move in together. as “friends.”
It was a sign that he still wanted to be close with me, maybe not on the same terms I wanted. I was so heartbroken in the absence of the “girlfriend” label that I didn’t care. I was glad it looked like my ex and I was back together. (even if just for these moments).
7) You are constantly communicating with each other
- Does your ex still text you daily?
- Does he still ask for your advice?
- Do they tell you what’s happening with their family or job?
Most people do not keep in touch with their ex. Especially right after a breakup.
If you and your ex are in constant contact with each other and feel a deeper connection than a platonic friendship, it is a clear sign that it is still possible for the two of you to get back together.
Maintaining or re-establishing a closed relationship with your ex can be the key to getting back together. If they’re already reaching out to Oft regularly, you’re one step closer to getting them back in your life. But wouldn’t it be wonderful if you weren’t second-guessing yourself or your ex’s intentions?
What if you could find a way to trigger an emotional connection so deep that the two of you not only got back together but lived happily ever after?
There is a way: You can rewrite the relationship and change your thoughts about your ex.
Couples expert James Bauer can teach you just that. In this excellent video, he will not only give you step-by-step ways to get your ex back but will help build a deeper level of connection.
Even if you realize that you and your ex are not meant to be together, James teaches tips and phrases to help you navigate all of your future relationships.
8) They Tell You They’re Thinking Of You
- Does your ex still call you when a song comes on that reminds them of you?
- Do they share the good news with you?
- Do they text you to see how your day is going?
Even though these actions seem minimal or harmless, they clearly show that your ex is still thinking of you.
Mindfulness is a choice. And your ex is choosing to be considerate of you. You may break up, but that doesn’t mean the relationship is broken.
If your ex constantly tells you that they are thinking of you in small and subtle ways, this could be their way of getting close to you again.
9) They are already in a (rebound) relationship
I know this sounds counterintuitive:
“My ex is already in a relationship. They probably still can’t think of me!…
If your ex and you just broke up and are already in a new relationship a few weeks later, don’t panic. It doesn’t mean they are gone forever or have forgotten about you. It means the exact opposite.
The need to find a new partner often stems from an attempt to fill a void. When people can’t process the breakup, they often want to replace their previous partner with a new one.
Dating author Clay Andrews writes:
Often, when people get into a relationship directly after breaking up or ending a previous relationship, they tend to speed that new relationship up very quickly so that it sort of looks like the previous ones.
They might elevate that new relationship to levels of commitment similar to the stories of commitment that maybe they had with you”.
If your ex is already in a relationship, don’t automatically assume they forgot about you. It may just be another sign that they will return when they realize that this person is not you.
10) They refuse to date anyone
On the other hand, if your ex isn’t dating anyone and is refusing even to try to back out from there, it’s a sign that they haven’t really healed or moved on.
- Is your ex willingly offering that they are single?
- Do they make it known that they are not interested in seeing someone new?
This is an obvious sign that they are not ready to move on, and you may be the reason.
They will be hoping that you will come back. They may need time to process the breakup. This is a confusing time for both of you; if you are not ready to wait it out, you may want to seek the advice of a relationship coach.
Instead of traditional therapy, after my breakup, I sought help from someone who focused on my relationship’s specifics.
Relationship Hero is a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complex and challenging love situations. They are excellent resources for navigating whether your ex is still thinking about you and whether they will return.
11) He hasn’t asked to take his things
We have all seen the scene from the movie… a couple breaks up, and within days, there is a box filled with anything and everything that belongs to the ex.
When a relationship is over, most of us collect any items that remind us of or belong to our ex and get rid of them. Nothing is more cringe-worthy than receiving a “can you get your stuff” text.
But… If you didn’t get that text or your ex didn’t ask to pick up your favorite sweatshirt you’re currently wearing while reading this, it could mean one of two things:
- They are attached to any memory of yours and are not ready to let it go.
- They are holding out for the prospect of reaching out to you to start a conversation.
Whatever the reason, don’t worry. Your ex is not out of your life yet.
12) They are interested in your dating life
It’s one thing to ask your ex if they’re dating anyone casually. It’s another thing to raise and ask specific and detailed questions constantly.
If you and your ex have a habit of catching up but are always interested in the topic of your dating life, they may have hidden intentions.
Writer Lachlan Brown addresses this by suggesting that this may not be entirely healthy or a sign that your ex has moved on if they are always bringing up your dating life. He writes:
“…if they’re asking you countless questions about a new man or woman in your life and they seem excited about any detail you share (particularly negative detail), then they might be trying to gauge the possibility of getting back together with you. They may even try to make out that the person you’re currently seeing, or interested in, isn’t as suited to you as they were”.
13) They try to get your attention
Does it seem like your ex often tries to get you to pay attention to them?
Do they hype their single status on social media? Do they comment on every single post you have? Show up “by chance” at places they know are part of your routine. Or maybe they intentionally flirt with mutual friends; make sure you see or hear about it online.
Whatever the situation, if it seems your ex is trying to get your attention, it’s a sign that you’re still on his mind.
They are reappearing in some way or another, which may indicate that they have realized that the grass is not greener on the other side and are looking forward to having another chance with you.
14) The breakup was due to long distance
“I know we loved each other, but distance can do strange things to people and before I was willing to tell you about it, I wanted to be certain that it would last.” – Nicholas Sparks
This may be the most complicated relationship pill to swallow and was the reason one of my exes, and I broke up.
Sometimes life takes us in different directions. Job or family circumstances may force us to relocate. When this happens, and you are in a committed relationship, it can be devastating.
More often than not, you try to make the long-distance thing work the first time.
But for any of you who have gone this route, you know it can be difficult.
My ex had to move on to the other side of the world! No matter how many plans we set, life got in the way. Additionally, lack of communication and insecurities started rearing their ugly heads.
Long distance is challenging, so it makes sense to break up when it’s too hard. If this is the only reason for your breakup, there is hope!
If you and your ex are meant to be together with some compromise and planning, there is a chance that the two of you will get back together.
15) You’ve always had an on/off relationship
If you and your ex have a pattern of breaking up and then getting back together, it’s a clear sign that you may be rekindling things. Even if this time it seems different or more permanent.
However, if you find yourself in the loop of makeup and breakups with your ex, I think it’s essential to sort out whether or not this is a healthy dynamic.
Author and relationship expert EB Johnson elaborates on why the loop breakup cycle may not be sustainable. He notes:
“… the repeated separation and reconciliation pattern is dangerous to our personal and long-term wellbeing. The more we make up and break up, the more it deteriorates our trust in others and ourselves. Because emotions are not honestly and openly acknowledged, they decay over time and create issues that are both complex and hard to conquer solo or with the aid of a partner. The stress of an on-again, off-again relationship is toxic to who we are, but it’s a pattern we can break when we know how to get in touch with who we are and what we want.”
So even though your pattern with your ex may be a clear sign that you’ll be “again” soon, you may want to think twice about how things used to be before returning.
16) They still keep in touch with your family
When your ex keeps in touch with your family, it can cause discomfort.
While there is a chance that he had a good relationship with your family and preferred to keep it, boundaries can often be crossed.
Your ex may still be in touch with your family because of whether they were the dumper or the dumpy, according to relationship coach Zaan of Magnet of Success. He writes:
“While the Dumpers keep in touch to selflessly water the relationship, Dumpy does so because the family of his ancestors is one of the few things left in his life that gives him a sense of control over the breakup.”
If you were the one who initiated the breakup, your ex might still communicate with your family in the hope that they will still be meaningful and relevant to your life.
17) They ask for FaceTime when you talk
Whenever my ex and I were in our breakup cycle, he always insisted on FaceTiming when we talked rather than texting or calling. In retrospect, I realized that it was because my ex was still attached to me in both a physical and a psychological sense.
By seeing my reactions when we talked, he could gauge my feelings and, in a way, control how engaged I could be.
It was clear that FaceTiming was a way for her to have some intimacy. If your ex always asks FaceTime, it’s a good sign that they aren’t ready to let you go.
18) They repost old pictures of you two
You haven’t talked to your ex since you broke up.
You are sad, lonely, and now you are…. confused?!?
Out of the blue, your ex posts a picture or photos of the two of you without any explanation other than the nostalgic hashtag. What do you give?
Before you panic and wonder if they’re breaking the no-contact rule, realize that your ex is trying to get your attention, especially if they know you follow them.
So how do you answer?
Well, Firstmust decides if you want to answer and then determine why. If their posts embarrass or upset you, should you say something? Are you hoping to revive a romantic dialogue by talking about #goodmemories?
I mentioned Brad Browning earlier – he’s a fantastic expert in relationships and compromise. Watch this free online video for several helpful tips to guide you through this situation.
19) They drunk dial you
You’ve heard the saying, “In vino, veritas.” In other words, “in wine, there is truth.”
When people drink, often what they say is true. A person who is intoxicated is more likely to speak out their deepest desires and desires.
If Your Ex Calls You When You’re Drunk, Guess What? You are their hidden truth and will.
When people drink, their inhibitions subside. They are not afraid of judgment or rejection. If your ex is drunk calling you, telling you they miss you or want you back, trust them!! They are speaking their truth, albeit perhaps with a bit of slander.
20) They admit they regret breaking up
It is normal to regret after a breakup. Often, we don’t show the best versions of ourselves when a relationship breaks up, and there are parts of the division break up that we regret.
However, if your ex admits that they regret breaking up together, it could mean several things, most notably that they are still thinking about you and possibly want to get back together.
Admitting wrongdoing or taking accountability for your role in the relationship is a massive leap towards development. If your ex is doing this, and you want to get back together, take it as a step in the right direction.
21) They tell you they still love you
The last and most important sign that your ex is returning is if they tell you they still love you. Simple, but maybe not that easy.
OK, so the signs are there: They want me back. Now what?
Your ex has indicated that they want to reconnect with you. But have you thought about what this means for you?
You and your ex broke up for some reason or reason. Things were not healthy or going as desired. One of you was sad. Do you want to get back together without first seeing if you can identify and then fix what was broken, to begin with?
If you’re like me and you and your ex played makeup and broke out tango, and you’re always wondering if this time, they’ll come back and stay, maybe it’s time to do some inner work.
Do you want your ex back? Or are you trying to fill a void? If they come back, will it make you happy? Or will the two of you break up again?
The answer to these questions can be found in your relationship with yourself.
Love and intimacy
Before you can have a functional and healthy relationship with your ex, or anyone else, you must first understand and build an active and healthy relationship with yourself.
After my last breakup with my ex, who had come back several times, I decided to break up, establish lasting contact, and dive deeper into my understanding of love and intimacy with myself.
I am very fortunate to have had a series of masterclasses and workshops with the world-famous magician Ruda Einde. His teachings have made me comfortable and see and heal myself more fully.
Ruda gave me a clear understanding of the meaning of love, which was life-changing. I cannot recommend his knowledge and guidance enough!
His masterclass is now available to everyone, which means anyone can access a true and deep knowledge of self-love and learn how to build a solid foundation for a healthy relationship.