Lifestyle

11 Signs Your Ex Is Stringing You Along (And What To Do About It)

Are you again in touch with your ex? Perhaps even casually relationship?

Maybe you’ve begun reigning the flame of affection with them once more and you’re undecided in the event that they’re 100% severe about it.

After all:

They inform you that they like you they usually need to begin issues up as soon as extra however you’ve acquired this nagging feeling that they don’t actually imply it.

It sucks, doesn’t it? You like them, however you don’t need to pursue one thing with them if it’s not going to lead wherever.

So let’s dig just a little deeper and discover out in the event that they actually need to date you once more, or if they’re simply stringing you along.

Here are 11 signs your ex is clearly stringing you along. After that, we’ll speak about what to do about it.

1. They are solely seeing you when it’s handy for them

Let’s be sincere for a second:

If your ex is actually severe about you, they might find time for you. They wouldn’t simply see you on a Saturday as a result of “they were going out anyway”.

They would plan a date and make it particular. They would put you up excessive on their record of priorities. They wouldn’t put ingesting with the boys increased than spending time with you.

If they’re solely seeing you on their phrases, it’s an indication they aren’t that severe they usually’re attempting to maintain you round as an choice.

2. They make plans however by no means observe via

Let’s say you two made plans to hang around on a Saturday evening.

You’re wanting ahead to it and you’re excited to see one another, however… on the precise day of the date, they simply don’t present up or give you a lame excuse as to why they aren’t obtainable. “Sorry babe, I can’t make the movie today, my sister is sick. How about next weekend?”

If your date has made plans with you on a number of events solely to blow them off, that’s a HUGE signal that they aren’t that severe.

Making plans to spend time collectively is one factor but when they aren’t really following via, it’s an enormous pink flag.

3. They don’t ask about your life, solely about the issues that occur inside their scope of affect

Your ex ought to be eager about listening to about what’s happening in your life no matter whether or not it impacts them or not. What if you’re going via a tricky time at work? They ought to care.

Maybe you’re transferring, or your household is preparing to go away on trip, or your canine is sick and you don’t know what to do.

No matter what it is, in the event that they actually need to know about it then they need to need to be part of it. They would need to assist and be helpful.

4. They are emotionally unavailable

If you’ve ever dated an emotionally unavailable particular person, you know precisely what I’m speaking about.

You could also be round them on a regular basis and do all the things you can to make your self helpful nevertheless it doesn’t matter as a result of they shut you out on the first signal of battle.

They don’t need to choose up the telephone, clarify themselves or hang around. They simply need to disguise away of their room and fake they’re not harm.

If they don’t present you that they’re able to being weak with you, it’s an indication they’re stringing you along.

When you need to be in a dedicated relationship, you have to be open and sincere with one another. That’s simply the way it is. You don’t keep away from getting shut.

5. They don’t ask you about your day

When you genuinely like somebody, you can’t assist however be eager about what is taking place of their life.

After all:

This is the particular person you have a crush on! You need to know what makes them tick. You need to know about their job, their life, their household.

Forget about being needy…studying about your crush is fascinating! And if you’re not fascinated, then you’re clearly not in love.

So if your ex by no means asks you how your day went or by no means actually listens when you speak, it’s an enormous signal that they aren’t eager about getting shut to you.

6. They don’t get jealous

This goes hand in hand with them being eager about your life.

If they don’t get jealous when you speak about your ex-boyfriend or the lovable lady at work, chances are high they’re not into you.

I do know, I do know, isn’t jealously a poisonous emotion?

Not essentially. It really reveals that you care about somebody. Obviously, you don’t need somebody that acts irrationally once they really feel jealous, nevertheless it’s vital that they a minimum of really feel that jealously.

If your ex simply doesn’t get jealous in any respect, then that’s a pink flag that they don’t genuinely care about you.

They could also be stringing you along whereas they search for a greater deal, or they simply aren’t that into you and need to transfer on to the subsequent one who will give them affection.

7. They continually put you down

Have you ever been in a relationship the place your associate continually put you down?

Maybe they have been extra eager about telling you how to do issues than they have been in really serving to you.

Maybe they referred to as you out on your flaws and made enjoyable of the issues that make you who you are.

It’s a horrible scenario to be in.

But you know what else?

It additionally implies that they don’t genuinely like you for who you are. They’re not severe about their emotions for you.

Instead, they’ve acquired this poisonous want to be in management.

So if your ex is placing you down and making you really feel unhealthy, then not solely is {that a} signal that you most likely don’t need to be in a relationship with them, however additionally they aren’t severe about growing a genuinely loving relationship with you.

8. They don’t deliver up your future

Have you had conversations with your ex that by no means actually go wherever?

Do you by no means actually get to speaking about what you’re each on the lookout for in a relationship, or what you need to do collectively?

Maybe they simply maintain speaking about themselves and their life however by no means ask about yours.

That’s an enormous signal of somebody who is stringing you along. They know the connection is not going wherever, in order that they aren’t that invested.

And once they don’t need to speak about what your future appears to be like like or what you need in a relationship, then chances are high they don’t see a lot potential within the relationship.

9. They don’t fulfil any of your wants

If your ex is solely fulfilling half of what you want from them, then it’s an indication that they’re stringing you along.

You want to really feel heard and understood. You want to see the identical curiosity in your life as you have in theirs.

You want to be cherished and reassured that somebody is on our aspect.

Your ex ought to be meeting all of those wants for you so in the event that they aren’t doing that…it’s an enormous pink flag that their emotions for you are shallow at finest.

10. They don’t deliver up their emotions for you

This is tough as a result of if your ex doesn’t understand how they really feel about you, then it may very well be a matter of them not realising what they need out of the connection, or they don’t understand how to talk their emotions.

But if they’re actually unhealthy at speaking with you and all the time need to disguise what they’re considering, then chances are high there is one thing improper with their coronary heart.

If they don’t need to speak about what you imply to them, then their emotions for you are most likely not real.

11. They don’t make you really feel particular

This ought to be the simplest one to establish as a result of if your ex doesn’t make you really feel like you’re particular or like they care about you, then they’re most likely not that severe about you.

In a wholesome relationship, your associate ought to present you daily that they genuinely love you and need to be with you.

If there is no effort on their half to give you reassurance or the romantic gestures that make your coronary heart flutter, then they don’t actually like you.

It’s a tricky cookie to hear, however you have to settle for it. If your ex doesn’t present that they care about you, then it’s time to transfer on.

But if you can’t transfer on, then we’ll go over some methods you can cease your ex from stringing you along and you can lastly transfer on.

What to do when your ex is stringing you along

So you assume the man you’re seeing could be stringing you along.

You need to know what to do about it however don’t understand how!

Well, that’s what this part is for.

1. Keep checking in on him and make it possible for he desires the identical factor as you do.

If the person you are pursuing is stringing you along then he most likely doesn’t need what YOU need.

Pay shut consideration and make it possible for this is an actual relationship and never simply one thing casual.

This is the place on the lookout for the signs will come in useful. You don’t need to proceed relationship somebody who is main you on, so it’s vital to get on prime of what your ex is considering.

So, what you can do?

Have an sincere dialog with them. Let them know that you actually need a long-term relationship. Set some boundaries with them and make it possible for they’re on the identical web page as you are.

Be sincere about the truth that you are prepared for one thing severe. If they’re not, then allow them to go. Remember, you deserve to be with somebody who desires to commit to you and never somebody who is stringing you along.

2. Stop accepting their excuses.

There comes a degree the place sufficient is sufficient. If it’s a continuing excuse and excuse then you want to know when to transfer on, or a minimum of instantly inform them how you really feel so you can see how they reply.

The one who is stringing you along will need to maintain issues the best way they’re so they may give you excuses as an alternative of solutions.

They’ll inform you that they will’t commit proper now however possibly sooner or later they’ll have the ability to give you an actual relationship. They’ll inform you that they don’t need to rush issues and that you want to wait.

Don’t settle for any excuses or ultimatums from them. If they maintain making excuses, then they’re not prepared for a dedication and you want to transfer on.

3. Keep your requirements excessive

Remember, the one that is stringing you along won’t ever commit regardless of how a lot time goes by.

This is as a result of they don’t need to get hooked up. They will all the time keep casual with you in order that they will depart you each time they need.

Don’t settle for any excuses from them, and maintain your requirements excessive.

You deserve somebody who desires to commit to you for the long-term, not somebody who is stringing you along. Always maintain that on the entrance of your thoughts. You deserve an actual relationship and never to be strung along.

If they’re displaying no signs of change, then allow them to go and discover another person who’s prepared for one thing actual.

4. Ask your self if they’re the one for you.

We all need to be liked and really feel liked and this is a fundamental human want.

It’s why we fall in love with somebody who makes us really feel particular and distinctive.

If you’re not feeling liked, then search elsewhere and ensure that you are prepared for a long-term relationship earlier than you calm down with somebody who doesn’t need the identical factor as you do.

Do you actually like them and are they the appropriate particular person for you?

Do your finest and have a look at them from exterior of the romance. Ask your self if you assume it’s actually a good suggestion to proceed the connection with him or not.

It’s crucial that you have a proper answer, in any other case, you will get in hassle sooner or later when issues don’t go effectively with your relationship!

Now if you can’t recover from them and you don’t need to transfer on, then you want to ask your self:

“How can I get my ex to commit to me over the long haul?”

In this case, there’s just one factor to do – re-spark their romantic curiosity in you.

I discovered about this from Brad Browning, who has helped 1000’s of women and men get their exes again. He goes by the moniker of “the relationship geek”, for good cause.

No matter what your scenario is — or how badly you’ve tousled for the reason that two of you broke up — he’ll give you numerous helpful ideas that you can apply instantly.

Show More
Back to top button